Daniel S. Lobel, Ph.D. says parents commit three common errors believing they are helping their children, when in fact, they are hindering them.
An expert has revealed three common parenting “errors” that can threaten a child’s mental health. Being a parent is hard, and there are no handbooks or instructions that are given to you when you finally bring home a baby. It is normal for a mom to feel overwhelmed at times and like she is making all kinds of mistakes. The problem is that society views mistakes as a solely negative thing when mistakes can be vital for our parenting. We learn from our mistakes, and that is the lesson we teach our children about their mistakes. So, moms everywhere should be eager to learn about things that they may be doing wrong and are usually not even aware of.
According to Psychology Today, there are three common errors that parents make that can hinder their child’s mental health. Daniel S. Lobel, Ph.D. is the expert in this case and he spoke about these errors. He made it very clear that parents commit these errors believing that they are helping their children.
The first error is not holding a child responsible for their choices and behaviors. This is done with the best intentions because parents want to make sure that their children are comfortable, and they don’t want them to have any negative experiences. A popular example can be when a child wants something, they receive it, and then they break it. In a lot of cases, parents will replace the item instead of using this as a teaching moment.
Another common error is encouraging a child to avoid situations that make them uncomfortable, something that was also mentioned in a report from CNBC. This can be a tricky one for parents because no parent wants their child to be in a situation they are not comfortable with, but these types of situations are unavoidable in life; it is about learning how to navigate them. The example that Daniel gives is if a child is saying that they don’t want to ride the bus to school, instead of encouraging the child to ride the bus, mom drives them to school every day.
The last error is letting a child believe that they are a victim. Everyone has moments in life where they believe that they are the victim, and in some cases, they may be. However, parents should not be reinforcing this belief. If a child doesn’t make the sports team, they were trying out for, parents are blaming it on other factors instead of encouraging their child to try harder or figure out why they didn’t make the team. All of these errors are directly related to a child’s sense of accountability and responsibility.
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